Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Randomize
