i just wanna soil my oats bro
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Randomize
