Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
Pants 0. Shit 1.
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
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