Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
my sisters under your porch take her home
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
