do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize
