Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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