It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
It's rum buckets o'clock
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Randomize
