I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
