Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Randomize