An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
I just gift wrapped bread.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize
