i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
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