Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
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