every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
