yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
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