I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Randomize
