Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
You pole danced in your parka.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Randomize
