what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
