Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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