Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
Randomize
