So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Randomize
