we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
I need a hoe opinion
go on
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
