Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
