Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize
