Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
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