This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
A bitchslap is in order.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
Randomize
