hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
