i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
