I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
Randomize
