Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
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