Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Thank you for not boning my boss.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
Randomize
