This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Randomize
