so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize