Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
Randomize
