I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
