The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
Randomize