What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
Randomize
