Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize
