Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Randomize
