and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
