Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
Randomize
