You're my little dorito
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Randomize
