I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
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