I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
