I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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