You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Randomize
