i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Randomize
