He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
lol hangovers are for mortals.
Randomize
