Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Randomize
