There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
