Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
Randomize
